R.I.P. Tafie

One of our dedicated readers (i'd venture to say she'd be reader of the month, if we had a budget to actually get her a ribbon), sent in the following e-mail written to her by her father this morning. Read it for its emotional depth, its tragic undertones, its yoda-like grammar, or just because it's the funniest eulogy to a pet you will ever read:

bad news. tafie has killed himself. it was a few days ago when he never come back for breakfast. i find his body on U.S. 1. his head was crashed. he did not have time to suffer. he died peaceful and honorable. he fight very hard for his territory. as the matter of fact just few days ago somebody cut his face so bad that i did not think he was going to make it. but he did. he put up with Armine for almost a month. he was homless and hungry all month that i was not here. he was tired of life. he crossed the border. he wanted to see what is on the other side. he never find out. i gave him a good place to sleep. ever lasting peace. he doesn't have to fight no more. far away from civilization that eventually ended his life. he had never seen a car before and he couldn't imagine how fast is going. white crazy drunk people. when he find out it was too late, that was the end of my poor cat tafie. he is gone. for-ever.