This Just In (Alalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalaaa!!)

According to the Drudge Report and judging from the increasingly frequent phone calls i've been getting at all hours from friends who feel it their duty to keep me abreast of news regarding Iran, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that "my peeps in the homeland" (direct translation from farsi) are in deep sh*t. In Iran's defense, I would like to make clear that its (not legitimately elected) President is INSANE and most of its citizens do NOT in fact wish that all the Jews migrated to Norway. Especially Jewish Iranians, they're feeling pretty uncomfortable about the whole thing.

As to nuclear capabilities, it is a little hypocritical of nuclear nations to prohibit another country's development of what they already have. It's like when my mom told me I wasn't allowed to get pregnant on prom night even though SHE already had four kids! On the other hand, the Iranian government isn't fooling anyone when it says it only wants to use nuclear energy for peaceful purposes. Much like Kathy Hilton's breasts, its ulterior motives are pretty thinly veiled.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I spent over a thousand bucks to go meet my family in Iran and I would be really pissed if they get blown up and my entire investment (time and money) is lost.

There's an ancient Persian saying that goes like this: When the cat and mouse agree, the grocer is ruined (yeah, persians had grocers way back when). Let's say the western powers are the "cat," and the Iranian public is the "mouse"...now if they cooperate and the cat refrains from killing the mouse, the Iranian government (aka, the "grocer"...following so far?) will surely be ruined. Afterall, its an ancient saying...that means it's true.
Harf balah (word up).