I Hope My Divorce is Never Granted

It's a sad country song by Kitty Wells, my life. Since joining myspace, I've given up men in favor of online stalking the ones I've already made out with (it's actually working out kinda well, and I very rarely have to weather a conversation with one of them). But don't worry-- this has not stopped me from doing stupid things. For instance, I made out with a guy in a bathroom during a party about 6 months ago, and he and I drunk dial each other now and then. Unfortunately, it seems we're never drunk at the same time. As those of you who have endured the loss of your first love (i.e. Chris Martin) might know, timing really is everything in a relationship. So, I've started to call my thesis my boyfriend. He's really sweet--we go to the park on sunny days and read the Sunday Times together. It's not sad. You don't need an actual man to make you happy. You need an actual man to buy you jewelry, but that's sort of it. Right? No, I am not shallow! Shut up. You don't know me.

Oh! And in European news, there's a little bit of a power struggle happening in Italy, which I looked up and am pretty sure is part of Europe. It'll probably resolve itself nicely, with Silvio Berlusconi launching a major media campaign against Romano Prodi, who will promptly do nothing. It's funny how the proactive right vs. inactive left-thing works out in Europe too. Let that be a lesson to the kids--Americanization/globalization is a real thing. That, and don't trust whitey.