Momullets

They're a cross between a mohawk and a mullet and they are slowly taking over Europe. Alert the police. All this focus on terrorists and we're letting a seriously criminal fashion trend fly under the radar. I dont have much time because ten swedish men are fighting for my time and affection as we speak, but I'd like to warn all my male American friends (a number close to the thousands now that the RBIE call-service has picked up), please, GOD, please don't let this happen to you.

That is all. I will be in touch. Don't make me take out the scissors.