Where the F*#! Am I?

"Did I do something wrong?"
"Yes, you did."
"I don't think so."
"What about the three children you have in the trunk of the car?"

This is part of what transpired when a mother in Maryland was pulled over for having three children in the trunk of her car. We'll let you read the rest over at The Smoking Gun, but while we're on the subject of "things a mother shouldn't do", I'd like to remind my mother of the time I fell asleep in the car while on a trip, and she thought it would be funny to leave me in there until I woke up, which as it turns out, wasn't till 3am---in a hotel parking lot...

Mom, if only i'd had the presence of mind to make an anonymous call to child services (and then feign sleep), you wouldn't be laughing it up at parties as you tell the story of your 12 year old daughter crouching in the back seat so criminals wouldn't see her because she was too afraid to open the door and go upstairs. I think you owe me. For one thing, you could at least add that I never knew the room number, and that staying in the car was a decision born of the will to survive rather than of cowardice. What kinds of parties are these anyway? Your friends are sick.